Stiff.

"Calm down!! Calm down!! Dont get a big DICK!" lol Is what my friends would drunkenly quote if someone was acting too excited for no reason. lol. But of course, as i predicted, noone is drinking that much anymore third year of college and everyone is snapping into 3rd gear. Ive been blogging less because it makes me feel as if im wasting time. Now i know what i need to do so I really dont need to write blogpost anymore lol. Only makes sense. I promised myself i wouldnt stick my head in the game again cause honestly im not quite ready but i now have two girls that i dont want to let go. lol. I need to decide which one to choose because both are great. one i feel like would be much better in bed but the other longboards....she LONGBOARDS. ughh if i couldnt masturbate my whole life id just longboard you dont understand lol. The minute SOPA started seriously comming in effect i was fucking online like..MUST.BUY. UNLIMITED LONGBOARD GEAR.

Speaking of material items my new material wishlist has grown dramaticly. Since im missing a fucking comma on my laptop i feel like i need a new laptop -_-. But thats at the very bottom of the material list. At the very bottom is a car then comes a new laptop. From there its listed as so: new place to live, new watch, snowboard, hat, shoes, clothes, school id then it comes tied with sennheisers mm550 travel and new longboard trucks. lol. Of course im going to get the trucks first so that i can hang with longboard girl asap, for short lets nickname her lbg because she seems, surprisingly, shaky in my life. ill get more into that later. So these headphones are the flagship of the bluetooth series sennheiser released about a year ago. These headphones, which value for about 600 bucks, comes with the following capabilities. Wireless bluetooth capability, that means it can receive signal within 30 ft from any audio device that supports bluetooth, it can remember up to 5 devices at once. It has roughly 10 hours of play time and about 7-8 when surround sound is activated. This capability allows the sound to sound as if it is not coming from the headphones but an external source, giving it that live and well, surround feel. It also has the ability to receive calls since it is a bluetooth device, there is a little mic on the right headphone that is very strong. It also has sound cancellation and talk through. This function is sponsored by noisegaurd, a very highend sound cancellation company. With this integrated in the headphones i can choose whether or not to activate an anti-noise, blocking out any external sounds without compromising the sound quality im playing. There is also a talk through function which allows me to listen to people talk to me without me taking off my headphones. Which is just a fun little add on. With headphones as big as the mm550 any external noises should already be muffled but with the talk through function you can hear people as if you dont even have the headphones on. I find that pretty awesome. Im thinking about using all of these functions to the fullest when im longboarding. There are buttons on the right ear that allow me to skip track, raise volume, answer phonecalls, and enable the talk through function. jizz...jizzz and jizz. Sennheiser is a very respectable German company that sells alot of very highend headphones and ive heard a pair of sennheisers before. You think headphones are headphones until youve heard music through sennheisers. Then you secretly look for your favorite pair of highend headphones lol. My god. I would die for a pair of mm550. if not then shit even the pxc 360 bt are fine. If not then the mm450 but the others are ehh..not really worth the money im looking to invest in a great pair of headphones i mean...id rather just save for one of those three. the pxc360bt are actually only going for 200 bucks right now :OO but the model up which simply includes the ability to recieve phonecalls slaps a grand 300 on it for a whopping 500 buck total. I dont give a shit. Im getting them. lol. For you dr dre users, which are mostly mac users as well. You guys fail XD. Dr dres are complete and utter shit compared to sennheisers lol. Many people just got them because they were marketed with apple and because of marketing. *sigh* hipsters. now with just 200 bucks extra i get better sound quality, wireless, noiseguard, surround sound, external functions to skip tracks higher and lower volume and recieve calls. DAMN. and for the same price i get all of that except receive calls. You dumb rich ass mother fuckers. lol Im jealous youre so stupid lol. and i swear if i get them stolen...im going to cry like a little bitch. Ill never wear them out late at night LOL and if i do, thats cause im fucking longboarding all the way home lol. I would never hop on the subway after like 10 with them around my head.

Now thats really what has been stopping me from blogging. Because if i have time im fucking online staring at these headphones like O.O....I WANT..I WANT.. just running in my head like a robot haha.

Theyll be as expensive as my fucking longboard right now!! which is going to cost about 500 bucks with the new goddamn trucks. ugh so much money but! i must save all my money because i have two girls to decide from while i wifey them up, like the bachelor. lol

Lets get back to that. One of them is going to take a sawed off and blow a fucking hole in my wallet while the other is very mature, has a car and honestly she is exactly what im looking for because shes out of my league but shes perfect because shes humble and down to earth making her accessible to someone like me. Shes done nothing but blow my mind and im trying so hard not to be open and not to go so fast. Thats how i fucked up with theresa and thats how i fucked up with every girl before that. My sister is REALLY trying to help me now lol it isnt hard because lbg laughs everything off. :] Im so stiff all the time that its hard to be myself. Im my blogself with her 24/7. The person that knows what hes doing that controlled and confident in bettering myself. That doesnt give me a chance to be who i am from a day to day basis though, which is a very goofy impulsive and spontaneous person. Shes not a shelters person, shes just someone i never met before, shes a "sweetheart." She speaks softly and has a very big heart. But shes a guy. It just so happened the characteristics that make her a guy is everything that define me as a person. She likes greek mythology and all philosophy too! we were talking about greek mythology for like..15 mins lol. It was mindblowing. With all these characteristics im trying to dig deeper to see if she is as impulsive as i because i dont want to come off as a really obnoxious person to her. She seems very calm and just smiley person. haha I cant stop thinking about her but my sister said "NO!! NO NEXT STEPS! You dont need to take it to the next step Thomas, give it 6 months until you take the next step. You might think youre being friendzoned but if shes interested then you can never be friendzoned." Im really going to take the fall of trust hear and take all the advise i can get because id be so happy if a genuine girl like her could be with me. She takes the first move but i can tell she could be easily scared away because shes so soft spoken and we talk so much about our surface self that i know nothing about what makes her tick. Hopefully, like all the girls i talk to shell loosen up. Im running out of things to talk to her about though lol. We talk all day everyday and at night we webcam until 3am. I wonder if she finds me attractive or if shes interested in me. My sister said not to worry about it though because if she friendzoned me then it already happened and you cant help it. Making sudden moves only sabotages my chances with her. and im thinking BLAHHH but sabotaging my chances is how i get comfortable. Its like breaking in a pair of hiking boots. I have to kick up dirt with it to feel comfortable in it. I honestly, dont feel comfortable but i know shell be worth it at the end. I hope this doesnt screw up my pool game. I took a fast step today and my sister literally slapped me across the head cause i asked her how many relationships shes been in. lol. Luckily shes talked to many guys before and that didnt deter her. She simply said she didnt want to talk about it just yet and winked and i agreed lol. Shes giving me alot of space to fuck up even though im not flirting. Im literally talking to her like a friend. Its such a weird swag im learning. To just be me. No flirting no saying shes cute no short smart remarks. Everything is very structured and everything i say comes from something ive done and honestly thats the hardest thing for me because like i said i only have 2 years to base things off of. lol. This is what i wanted though, this is everything i wanted. The grandest test and it even has the supports i want because she is so down to earth. I already told colin that if i fail this then im turning gay and he can have me LOL cause i honestly could not be in a relationship again, clearly so theres no more use of me fighting.

This is all quite thrilling and stressful for me. The second girl is my comfort girl. Shes the one i broke into and its fine cause shes taken so i can use that extra force, its the extra push i need to bring her towards me, i feel. I tell her what im feeling i call her beautiful i wrap my arms around her i sing and act completely instinctive around her. lol. Its great :] were going to hang out tomorrow. SHE asked me to hang out. I find that very sexy. Im doing already enough work as it is text you and shifting my game then playing hard to get. Im very socially awkward so its nice to know that the girl is willing to come halfway. Both of these girls clearly see that much, that i am socially awkward but i have more than what meets the eye. lol

UGh girls. i have work everyday this week at 7am. I missed revolve audtions due to chinese new years and staying up talking to LBG. speaking of acronym girls. TFK and i texted today. I apologized to her for not keeping in touch cause ive been busy and it was a very friendly text :] she has such a warm heart that i like to send text like that to her. She complied and we texted back and forth for a bit, then we stopped abruptly and she exted me goodnight. and she wants to get coffee this weekend...but i told her ill see because honestly im crossing my fingers for LBG to come back to boston :x i want to go to UMA with her and possible rockclimb together.

But yeah because ive not been my impulsive self for these past three days ive been feeling very dead, and experiencing a very lazy out-of-body mood as if someone else is talking and moving for me. Im really going to let everyone change me because i know now that hell, my old way isnt working and i really cant fuck this one up so im letting everyone pull and push me mentally and emotionally. Everyone being my sisters, donvu, chris, doug and my gay friend colin because hes forever trying to know whats going on in my life. lol Im feeling very vunerable right now since im not in my comfortzone so hopefully i can you know..work efficently tomorrow at work. because honestly at such a fast pace and im not actually there i can fuck up again and i dont want that. Douchebag mode is still in gear so that has been helping lol

To sum my life up right now..Girls and money. P.s.LBG's favorite place in boston is the waterfront as well :D and I told LBG i have a blog..but then i remembered the entire entry i wrote about her and told her my blog is very personal and she might think im fucking crazy lol. She has a tumblr and she agreed and we didnt trade links. Im really trying to play it slow here >.> i mean i wouldnt want her to read all the post about theresa that were not a month ago. lol I dont want to come off as a player..and she doesnt know i smoke yet. OMG im becoming everything i hate >.< im not saying i am a player but hell i mean...i am talking to two girls at once. lol