Whoever owns the most weed wins!

So today and yesterday was chill..i got pretty fuckin hammered last night...i guess its cause i just let go of my ego and just let the liquor hit me. It was fun while i was with all my friends i was longboarding drunk as fuck managed to ride it but still fell on my ass several times laying there letting the stars circle around my head for two seconds lol. I was a fuckin hot mess haha but for the most part, aside from motor skills and a random stagger or sway in my footsteps i was pretty fine haha. The night ended after i smoked wiht jonas jason jay and nora. It was really chill. Me and jay and jonas got into a business discussion until 4am and found it absolutely brilliant how Whoever owns the most weed wins! haha We got into this topic talking about gold and how it is the most priceless currency and he who holds the most gold, no matter how bad the economy goes, wins. Because there is nothing to back up the manmade dollar and once what we know as black gold, or oil, runs out then the entire world is absolutely fucked. It was a serious mindblow talking to jay, a very well educated businessman. We got really deep into economics and he proved that no matter what, united states is FUCKED. We owe 16 TRILLIONNN dollars. He did well to illustrate how much 16 trillion is, even to the government. Its impossible to rebuild this nation without it completely collapsing first. This drove me and jonas into a shock and awe high state and like...were fucked! haha so what im going to do when i hit 25 is buy a fucking passport, and get ready to leave united states cause its going to go into complete and utter shit in the next half century. But to brighten matters up we thought...holy shit the first currency to be worth something after the dollar is weed. Like gold, it is naturally grown unlike any other drug, cures cancer and makes people happy. It cannot be synthesized and as of now, to buy an ounce it cost fucking like...120 bucks. lol. HE WHO HOLDS THE MOST WEED WINS lol. I mean it makes some sense from a non business-major perspective and we just went with it the entire night hahaha. Even after the world goes to shit...cause if united states collapses due to lack of oil, most likely the entire world will start to fall. People would want to get high. hahaha But i need to start seriously saving gold...i didnt realize how important it is to own gold. it is absolutely a MUST in order to have any fighting chance of futhering your family line for the next century. because after the american dollar goes to shit gold is gold and there is only so much of it in the world. Its the 5th most valued currency in the world currently, underneath the us dollar, something...something..and oil. all of which has nothing to back it up. Seriously, EVERYTHING runs on oil, its ridiculous. and china is going to rule the world. lol

Last night, id say, was a veryy memorable high and im glad i was able to smoke then hang out with jay. Honestly there are so many people in our group that i havent actually hung out with many of them individually to see beyond the character they bring to the group as a whole. Jay, i can tell and i always knew, was a very cool well educated and trustworthy guy. Business men like him and kayrun which were id consider very close acquaintances to me are always great to have in a group as big as ours. I refer to them always as mr jay. and mr. kayrun with a business firm handshake, usually complimented with a toast and then beers, shots, weed and parties. haha

Another thing me jonas and jay talked about was standards. Jay brought up the topic of woman and i quote, "Intelligent females are such a rare commodity in this world, you dont understand." and i think i do. I kinda want to talk to emily and tell her im genuinely sorry even though she probably hates my guts. but i literally, next time i see her im going to tell her that i mean not to intrude in your life once more but im sorry, and thank you for being smart. I honestly didnt know what i had and i lost it and you do always will deserve so much better. she was so smart. Im simply giving compliments where theyre due haha. I need to higher my standards again. When i said to jay and jonas, "Its college im honestly just looking to fuck and chill and have fun and hey if i meet that girl then sure." They both reply in disgust and say, "No, always class i always keep my standards so high, people say it is impossible but i want a girl smarter than ME" That is semi ego but its so true, that used to be my viewpoint...which is why i saw interest in emily in the first place but i was so caught up on the emotion that was lacking and MY lacking that over time ive been subconciously and habitually lowering my standards. Never ever again will i look for a fuck buddy and even if. EVEN IF. it will be a very smart, down to earth girl that knows whats shes doing. This is another reason why i enjoyed getting high with these men, they said it before but it wasnt until i was high that i questioned myself and got a reality check.

Sure, i might be a bit desperate and creepy and my game is off which is why i had to lower my standards but hey! There are girls out there for me. That are smart and mature but just as weird and sexually active as i. Take for example the many girls like lauren, jchao and...uhh..thats all i know lol. But they are WORLDS apart from one another, sure they would make great friends but they are so different and yet, they both are perfectly adequate females. Unfortunately lauren and i are best friends and i promised kevin and my other highschool friends that i wouldnt flirt with jchao. oops. but ive kept my promise! i put her in friendzone because she is SUCH a bro. ahha Monica might seem silly but she has a strong mind, i know this because of all that she hides after all these years. Especially during the time when her father and grandmother died within the same month. Both being immediate family members. I pride myself in not being emotional but i definitely showed that i reflected upon my life once my distant uncle passed away. She has strength and i see it. She has a sense of humor, smart and though she may be immature she would make a wonderful wife in the years to come. Unfortunately i knew her as long as ive known lauren and shes been taken for the past 6 years so i cant see her that way but hell..im being realistic.

Which brings me to theresa. Im sorry, but your time is up I like mature and determined woman. a girl that knows what she wants and takes it by the horns. Thank you for teaching me so much about myself and my limits but well..honestly i cant see you any more than a friend and a fellow coworker anymore. I hope you honestly werent coming onto me cause id feel really bad and if you come back and give in your 50% again i might just take you back to be honest LOL im at a very vunerable state right now so yeah >.> that whole rant about high standards might just be postponed until a week or two. But yeah im not looking for a whole fuckin life story...just communicate let me know what its like to walk in your shoes. I was hanging out with monica today and thought she was attractive...Thats how crazy its gotten. haha. Thats really bad. Im like desperate right now but i dont show it. haha. im in such a ready state to be in a relationship that i would fucking buy a dog...just to buy it food and hug it all day and spoil the shitt out of it to get that love in return. haha I would fucking date a midget just to take her out on fancy dates...like seriously..wtf. haha no offense to midgets, there are probably beautiful people that are midgets..they just arent my type. >.> lol Matter of fact, they are probably smarter than 50% of the girls i know of because of the fact that they have to cope with the extra effort that come with the lifestyle of being a midget. Actually...pause...if theresa seriously started putting in her 50% i dont think id even like her...its so obvious shes being ridiculous, If anything id probably be more pissed off than anything. Unless she somehow pours her heart out to me and shows she meant no harm which is possible. I mean she honestly just wanted to be friends, perfectly fine. Just fuckin dont throw mix signals at someone that CLEARLY likes you. Then again she never really did throw me mix signals besides in person so idk that count be just her being friendly and mature.. haha anywho...time to focus on gym and school!:) lol i already stopped talking to all the people i supposeably rekindled with but hey that just means they are all mature enough that i can just hit them up and have a good conversation in the future :]

Also, Idk i have a meditation instructor now. Hes in college and has apparently been studyng chi for 13 years now...i find it kinda bullshit because he and i dont exactly sync and well one thing you should know about meditation is that its so fascinating because everyone that does it comes to the same conclusion for everything! There is literally one morally philosophically correct answer to everything so i find it interesting that he isnt on the same wavelength. I remember naturally attracting people much older and my age that mediated when i did it harcore in 9th grade and though we all have different timing, it was always the same epiphanies. You do not unterstand how close to impossible it was for the earth to be even habitable, Nevermind the possibilty of that along with the possibilty of society to end up this way. Since the percentage rate of sucess for this outcome is so ridiculous low one will only come to realize there is only 1 answer to everything, even if the answer is to just simply accept it for what it is.

Welp, moral of the story: hoard weed for the zombie apocolyse because after oil runs out and the country's economy collapses people would get weak and sickness will spread and a plague will form and zombies will be born and in times like those...just get high or leave the country lolol and sell the fuckin weed hahaha.

Another moral is Aim for the stars! I am worth so much more than i know.