The new Shit

Im like some fucked up pendulum, seriously. The only way i can feel like i made progress is if i go back and forth. like one step forward then two steps back. I think i have life ocd. because i dont move forward even though sometimes thats all i really need. Instead im contradicting myself just to go back to make sure everything was meant to be. It happens naturally. Fuck. For instance take my social life right now. I dont know wtf is going on with me. It started yesterday right when i was with lauren and tammy. Like something snapped and now i hate people again and im very easily irritated by like...human presence. Dude, that shit was like ten chapters ago and it doesnt even fit the personality i have anymore at all. But idk. now i just feel like sitting in a room, and make me a sandwich sure but give me a ipod and a nice landscape and thats really all i need. Time to myself and time to think. I DONT WANNNAAA lol. jesus i swear im like bipolar i clearly am trying to tell myself i dont want to do something i want. but yeah thats a good example. Cant i just live a stable life? idk. Im constantly cranky cause i want to go out cause people make m cranky but i enjoy the comfort of an empty room and im too lazy and stubborn to leave.


Blah. I have everything but nothing without a social life..


The Shins- Australia ( now i know why i was so addicted to this songg)
(Born to) Born to multiply,
Born to gaze into night skies,
When all you want’s one more Saturday.
Well look here, until then
They're gonna buy your life’s time
So keep your wick in the air and your feet in the fetters
‘Till the day
We come in doing cartwheels
We all crawl out by ourselves
And your shape on the dance floor
Will have me thinking such filth and gouge my eyes.

You be damned to be one of us, girl,
Faced with the dodo’s conundrum
I felt like I could just fly
But nothing happened every time I tried.

A dual tone on the wall
The selfless fool who hoped he’d save us all
never dreamt of such sterile hands.
You keep them folded in your lap,
Or raise them up to beg for scraps,
You know he's holding you down
With the tips of his fingers just the same.
Will you be pulled from the ocean,
But just a minute too late,
Or changed by a potion,
And find a handsome young mate
For you to love.

You'll be damned to pining through the windowpanes,
You know you'd trade your life for any ordinary Joe’s,
Well do it now or grow old.
Your nightmares only need a year or two to unfold.

Been alone since you were twenty-one,
You haven't laughed since January.
You try and make like this is so much fun,
But we know it to be quite contrary.

La la la la la la

Dare to be one of us, girl,
Facing the android's conundrum,
I felt like I should just cry,
But nothing happens every time I take one on the chin,
You himmler and your coat,
You don't know how long I've been,
Watching the lantern dim,
Starved of oxygen,
So give me your hand,
And let's jump out the window.